G l i t c h y G o b l i n !

Woohoo, did I love No More Heroes! That game was amazing, a wonderful flow of bloody combat and mundane activity, with a clever storyline and engaging characters! I can’t WAIT for the second one, yay, I got it for my birthday!

I would rather have been beaten with a stick until I peed myself and wept bitter, bitter tears. So long as Desperate Struggle had been a great game, a worthy successor to the first game, I would have been happy, even with broken ribs and ruptured organs.

In my opinion, Desperate Struggle did a few things right and overall just made me weep for the game I wanted, the game I’ll never have.

I’ll gladly elaborate more after Vegieza’s review of the game next week.

Until then, let’s see the glitches, shall we?

I can’t seem to find many via youtube, but mine were very distinct. In the game, you purchase clothing, often and ridiculous prices. They look cool and you can dress Travis however you want. Downsides?

Well, every so often, clothes will unbuy themselves. Meaning you either re-purchase them or run home and show the game you have the item and then it un-un-buys itself, sometimes. Sometimes, it’s another $120,000 down the drain.

Talk about frustrating.

Nextly, I liked to Dress Travis differently for each fight. Make him actually discard the dirty clothes for new, less bloody ones. Yknow, like a real assassin. Unfortunately, Travis would often just… switch. I’d be heading for a boos fight, save, and poof! Now he’s in that crappy blue jacket with techno shades and no sense of matching or balance. I know, big deal, right? Still very frustrating to me to watch the cutscenes with a crappily dressed Travis after i had wasted so much time buying clothes and picking out his outfit.

Blah. The game was still a failure and I’m even considering trading it in, just so I don’t have to be reminded of what had the potential to be my favorite game on the Wii ever. Until my tissues and whiskey are gone. -GG

Ah, the good old Dreamcast. A wonderful system that wasn’t supported properly and thusly fell to an early, undeserved grave. That being said, it had some amazing games, and (unfortunately) pushed Sonic into 3D. Here we go.

Now, in this game, it was more than easy to fall through the stage, have audio cut out or skip, live while standing where you should have died, so on and so forth. But there was one instance of falling through the level that stood out.

It was in Station Square, the over world level. One of the locales is a hotel, with big, blue automatic doors. Me, being a sonic fan, decided to speed roll and shoot through the doors, in classic Sonic fashion. The game hated this, and I fell into the water below, and to my death.

I also stood on the back of the final boss as Sonic, got stuck underground as Knuckles, got caught in the air as Amy… the list goes on and on.

This is the only time I’ve been able to fall through a stage in a non-combat level. Impressive. Here’s some other Sonic Adventure glitches, courtesy of Snakeman123456. Check out ALL his videos, he’s had TONS of Sonic Adventure Glitches.

I’ll be playing catch-up today. There’s no Sunday Mattinee this week, but You’ll be getting my review and music as soon as I finish salivating over this week’s movie. Til then. -GG

Well, my long work hours with huge expanses of empty time combined with a DS that has a broken top screen has lead to one thing for the Goblin: Advance Games Gallore.

One of my current favorites is the fan favorite GBA RPG Golden Sun.

Well, while playing this game, I was just north of Tolbi, in the Altmiller Cave. I was fumbling around in the darkess, and used Reveal to light my path. I then moved towards a door and boom. I walked through the wall. I was still bound by the wall’s boundry, I was half behind the wall, half on the floor connecting to the wall. I walked aback and forth a few times, the game lagged, and then all was suddenly right.

Weird. Here’s another fun one for you. Thanks to kreation893.

See ya next week, Goblinites. -GG

Now, lately I’ve been playing a lot of nice games, including one out of the blue fun-fest called The Witcher.

The game is a ton of fun, with a deep world, a politically heavy storyline, and choices that actually MATTER, unlike Fable, IMO.

The combat is rich, albeit terribly annoying every now and again, and the characters are wonderfully interesting. Play it.

That being said, there are a TON of glitches. When you first get to the main town, you’re told to go to an investigator. Instead, I did EVERYTHING ELSE, and actually finished quests I didn’t even have yet, even found the investigator’s dead body before he died, reported it to him, he left, ACTUALLY died, came back as an impostor, and finished ALL my quests.

There’s been enemies I can’t target, enemies who died ten seconds after I hit them, the game crashed a few dozen times, and then, the wraith.

Now, the wraith in town is friendly until you attack him, but he IS a monster you’re supposed to kill. However, if you attack him and guards are near you, they think you’re attacking a CITIZEN, and kill you to protect the demonic ghost. Nice.

Here’s a few more glitches, for your amusement. Thanks to xclavex, kooper2k, and rjskt59 for their videos.

Ok, be back later for sunday and today. See ya. -GG

Now, I know this is a tad odd for my site, and possibly counteractive to yesterday’s post, but today, I’m going to post the biggest glitch I encountered in the Brutal Legend Demo.

With that, I bring you my first ever Demo Glitch.

Now, I’ve ranted and raved about how good Brutal Legend is, and I love it to death, but I did have a serious disappearing enemy glitch in the middle of the demo.

Spoilers ahead, all in goblin green.

After meeting up with Ophelia, Eddie’s love interest and main female of the game, the two assemble the Deuce and rocket out into the enemy filled beyond, running over as many cultists as you dare to dare.

However, as I approached a block of enemies, they simply blinked out of existence, without so much as a bloop or a pop.

Not all the glitches are spectacular, but I’ll keep em coming. That being said, here’s a more interesting glitch, even if the entire glitch is over and done in the first minute of the five minute long video. Kudos, Emerio.

For those of you who don’t remember Prey, it was a phenomenal Sci Fi FPS about a Native American man named Tommy Tawodi, who wants to take his girlfriend and leave their reservation and make a new life, just the two of them.

Now, at the games opening, two bar jerks are harassing your girl, you can check out a full working juke box, watch some muted TV clips, and play some video games, including a Pac Man knock-off, slots, and poker.

I was playing on Xbox 360, and my friend wanted me to try for the achievement, which was awarded for winning $200 in poker.

You’re supposed to play for ten minutes, get the achievement, and then club some jerks to death, get abducted by aliens, listen to Blue Oyster Cult, yadda yadda…

I played video poker for three hours, and racked up multiple million dollars while my friend got angrier and angrier. We even took pictures, but later in the game, there is a broken machine that always lets you win, making my pictures less believable.

Lame. Until next this week. -GG

Now, I love me some Batman, and this game was good, to a point, but holy snapdragons, Batman, did this game ever have glitches.

The game, while amazing at free-flow combat and stealth for non-stealth gamers like myself, followed the feel of Batman to the letter and left me yelling ‘I am the freakin’ NIGHT!’ all over the place as I stomped the nuts off inmates, crazies and the occasional terrible boss.

Now, you should play it, but go ahead and get a stuffed animal to pound mercilessly every time a boss shows up, because those fights SUCK. Still, play the game. It’s fun. Mostly.

Now, on to the glitches. Spoilers in Joker Hair Green.

There were various places where I would glide and get stuck in a slow motion, never-ending fall motion that I would have to adjust out of to land on the platform, no biggie there.

1. Well, while fighting Killer Croc (ask anyone, worst fight ever) you find yourself on a series of crappy, breakable platforms that Croc can break through easily and end you. Luckily, if you move slowly and quietly, he won’t know where you are… or so they say. I had died a few times and was using the Line Launcher, a zip-line device to coast easily down the halls silently, as it didn’t make any noise or create vibrations. The scanner said I was fine, that I wasn’t even MOVING, when bam, a pre-scripted Croc attack happened, and he popped up INTO my face. Not even a chance to save myself. Tried it again, just to make sure. It was indeed pre-scripted.

2. Next, during the second fight against Scarecrow, you’re supposed to remain hidden, under penalty of instant death, should he spot you. However, as his all-seeing gaze swept towards me, I did an evasion jump and he missed me entirely. However, the game then froze, as I blew got to an area without dropping crates to hide behind. Guess the game freaked out. 

3. I killed one henchman, he landed on a display in the mansion, with his back flat on top of the display and his feet still on the floor. His body made a perfect 90 degree angle at the small of his back and detective vision still said he was ‘unconscious.’ Riiiiiight, Batsy.

4. I exited the mansion only to discover a guard strung up by his ankle. Being compassionate, I literally said ‘I can’t leave him strung up like this, it’s disgraceful to the dead.’ I then threw a batarang and cut him down, only for him to fall onto his neck, his body hunched over so he ended up kneeling with his face shoved into his groin. I tried to knock him over, but nothing would move him. I felt terrible. 

And while no one else has recorded their glitch vie youtube, I did find one lol worthy glitch here. 

Kudos, Shadow540.

Until monday, Goblinites -GG

If you happen to be reading my blog, wondering what this game is, then please do yourself a favor and go purchase it. This game is one of the last, great platformers of our time. That being said, Psychonauts is not without glitches.

For one, though I can find no pics of it on the internet, I was able to use the brain tumbler from the first landing up the stairs by angling the camera oddly.

Next, you can abuse invisibility to sail through the final fights. Think fast, losers!

Last, the final figment in the Meat Circus is nigh impossible. You actually have to spam jump commands and PRAY to float just to grab the thing.

Lastly, I am a comletionist. So, if you level up as completely and thoroghly as I did, you start getting upgrades to powers YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE YET. I actually gut the upgrade to my shield power before OBTAINING the shield power. Yup, just another day in my life.

Too bad it probably won’t ever get a sequel… but we can still dream…

Until next time -GG

Ah, one of my favorite glitches… for one of my LEAST favorite games.

Halo 2.

The glitch was a simple figure eight that ended in a MASSIVE argument, but it was one of the coolest matches ever.

Me and some friends were hanging out and playing Halo, 3 on 2, their favor.

Jeremy and I were on a team in Blood Gulch. He happened to grab the sniper rifle, I picked up a rocket launcher. We then got the second sniper for me, just to keep it out of the hands of our opponents.

We then hijacked a Gaus Hog and proceeded to do a figure eight around the two bases, killing all who spawned before they could even hope to resist.

I blame Ian for the weapon choice, they blamed us for being cheap, but either way, at that point, the match was 30 kill to 2, our favor. Had a phone not rung, it would have been a massive near shutout.

However, due to me sucking unbelievably, the phone DID ring, and they came back to whip us good. I suck at Halo.

Trying this out, making my postes short and sweet, for easier reading.

That being said, let’s jump right in, shall we?

This week’s game: Crazy Taxi.

Two maps, three partial songs, four characters, and more fun than Kingdom Hearts' entire game series put together.

Crazy Taxi is a simple game: you drive a cab, you pick people up, you drive real fast to their destination, you get paid. Repeat process.

That being said, one place you can drop people off is KFC, and it was here that my favorite Crazy Taxi Glitch occured.

I was pedaling (using the bike) up to KFC’s front door, sliding into a devilishly stylish stop, slamming the side of my vehicle into the pole in order to make an instantanious stop.

Didn’t work that way.

Instead, I bounced off, hit it again, bounced off, hit again, repeat process, rising into the air for thirty seconds until finally, angry, my customer leapt out into the air, cursed, checked his watch, and walked away.

Looked like this, but on a KFC sign. Thanks, shadowmoses45.

A tiny bit of mild swearing in that video, if you’re worried about that.

Until next week, I’ll go ahead and pick a car and driver… GUS. C’mon, let’s have some fun! -GG