G l i t c h y G o b l i n !

Now, for those of you who’ve missed it, Paranormal Activity is sweeping the nation.

Now, I know this movie has the crappiest movie poster of all time, but read on, all will be explained.

Now, most people will tell you this movie is one of the scariest films of all time. I am not one to disagree, but it only hits about 50% of the audience.

Why? The answer is simple.

One out of four (estimated) people hate the shaky handi-cam technique of movies like Blair Witch Project and the more successful Cloverfield.

Another one of the ten have very little imagination or empathy, and therefore won’t be able to connect with the couple’s situation and fear as they fear.

The last few have actually been scared worse in real life, will over analyze the special effects and only like popcorn flicks, are ‘actual paranormal investigators’ who claim to have seen worse, or people who refuse to have a good time so they can bash it on the internet later.

However, if you aren’t one of those people, and you don’t like this movie, I will literally lick my commode. You have to give actual reasons and CONVINCE me you aren’t trolling, but hey, no one is reading this anyway.

However, this movie earned its rating in one more way: the cost. I think there’s something to be said for scaring me on a small budget. The 2007 Halloween movie, directed by Rob Zombie, cost $20,000,000. Most people said it wasn’t even close to being scary.

Cloverfield cost more, at $25,000,000, and was a FAR better movie, IMO.

Blair Witch cost $60,000 and has turned into a huge joke.

How much did Paranormal Activity cost? $11,000.

Yup, you could have made this movie 5 times for the cost of Blair Witch, or TWO THOUSAND TIMES for the cost of Cloverfield, and in my opinion, it was simply amazing.

To top it off, it was filmed in a single week.

As a movie, on its own, Glitchy Goblin gives Paranormal Activity an 8 out of 10.

As an impressive use of minimal funding, Glitchy Goblin gives it a 10 out of 10.